I’ll never forget Raven’s football player Ray Rice and his story of domestic violence in 2014. Only a few years after I was separated from my abuser, the triggers were uncontrollable as Ray’s story seemed to be told, rehashed, and replayed everywhere. I got the impression that for the first time, our story of abuse took center stage on a huge platform.
To me, it seemed to be more of a curious, intriguing, I can’t believe it happens kind of story. Not a narrative that came with supportive help and actual call to action for change. But, I often hoped that something impactful might develop as a result.
Regardless of what did or didn’t happen, the continuous talk about the subject for months on end started a continuous trigger that had no boundaries within me. I never knew when Ray’s situation was going to be brought up at work, on the sports channel my sons continued to watch, or online as I read the news.
Triggers After Abuse
My heart aches as I feel like I’m falling into another world-event-caused trigger situation. The Corona virus is impacting our worlds completely. As I sit here vividly remembering where I sat with my 3-week-old daughter watching the Twin Towers collapse during 9/11, I realize the time I am currently experiencing will forever be ingrained in my heart. And the triggers will impact my future forever.
Anyone who reads my blogs knows I write about triggers a lot due to my internal struggle:
Will my triggers control my world or will I have the strength to stand up to and minimize their effect?
My shopping bag of triggers is refilled daily; I never know how heavy today's bag will be.
But here’s what I do know: the greatest weapon I have against my triggers is God’s word. God’s word reminds me:
And the greatest way to activate God’s word within me is through my morning devotion and prayer time. As I journey through this season of Lent, I am learning a lot from reading Mark Patterson’s book Draw the Circle, the 40-Day Prayer Challenge.
I have had a couple of people ask me what my morning devotion and prayer time looks and feels like. Please let me know if you’d like me to write about this next week.
Blessings and safety to all,
Hi, I'm Sue
Welcome to my blog! I served twenty-one honorable years on active duty, living a double life of capability and accomplishment in the service while enduring brutality and abusiveness in my twenty-one year oppressive marriage. Today I'm happily married and have three children who are my inspiration and motivation.
My goal is to help combat the lies of abusers with the truth of God. I hope you find my words to be healing and helpful through your own life experiences.
Being separated from my abusive husband didn't make me a domestic violence survivor. It surely didn't release me from the grip of his brainwashing control and the innate power he had on me.
Read the full raw story in my new book, Rock Bottom and Faithless.