My Response to Agitated and Uptight People

Lacking Boundaries with Agitated and Uptight People

I admit, in my small world of existence, there are people who are uptight in nature. I am not particularly happy about this as I work so hard in keeping my world as calm as possible. But, it’s inevitable that sometimes negativity rears its ugly head. Take my work environment for example, almost daily I encounter someone who is “just having a bad day” and wants everyone to know about it.
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Who am I to judge? I am sure quiet, withdrawn disposition makes some people uncomfortable. So, I understand the only thing I can control is my reaction to overexcited, uptight, anxious, and agitated people.

Anxiety - Domestic Violence

My Reaction

​I need to work on my reactions to anxious people in my world. The first thing I am noticing when an anxious person starts to talk to me is that I almost immediately voice my opinion. And then I voice my opinion again, but maybe in a different way. All I feel during those conversations is my heart screaming “let me help you calm yourself down”. Or, I am thinking, “let me help you figure this out”.

But, stepping back I realize all their anxious disposition is doing to me is taking me from zero to 100 on my anxiety meter within 10 seconds. Yes, physically I am talking with this person but emotionally, I am remembering the battering with my abuser as I desperately tried to just once win/persuade an argument.

What would be more effective is for me to first build a boundary around myself when I come close to uptight and negative people. I should look at these people and repeat to myself: this person’s anxiety is theirs’s to deal with; their anxiety is not for me to worry about. Repeat: this person’s uptight and agitated state is their problem; it is not my situation to fix or worry about. The invisible fence of safety surrounding my heart and mind should ricochet (keep away; don’t allow to stick) any negative thoughts.  If someone in my world wants to be negative than that is their choice. But, I am immediately and forever giving myself permission to not accept their feelings as my own!

The faster I can counter the influence of my own anxiety has got to be my goal in all situations! Imagine how motivating it would be if, I quickly countered someone’s negativity with a barrier around my heart; your bad mood isn’t allowed! Think of the hours of anxiety, and eventual coping skills to calm myself down, saved!

I have to keep my mental stability a priority in my world. It is imperative that I do what is needed to put the importance of my staying calm over the useless effects of someone else’s anxious disposition.

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